Dear Diary

Lets call it Bloggers Block!!

by lizzie233 @ 2008-03-31 – 10:56:38

Firstly, thanks so much to everyone who sent birthday wishes, that was just lovely and so unexpected, in fact I was totally spoilt for the whole of what turned out to be a very elongated birthday. I'm certain I didn't deserve all the attention, cards and gifts, but completely loved it all. If you look at each of our 10 year sections in life, I am now precariously balanced on the hill just waiting to slide down towards the next BIG landmark and I'm not going to pretend it's not a daunting prospect, softened only by the knowledge that aging is something we all have in common, NO ONE gets out of it, phew what a relief, well partial relief, that is.

Since last blogging, life has been much as normal, and for that I am eternally grateful, no surprises is just fine by me at this stage in the circle. My offspring are healthy and in work, my grandson is a joy still and as both his little personality and vocabulary increase he just becomes more and more amazing and entertaining. Due to my daughter's relationship situation, I often feel somewhat saturated by the company of both of them, but perhaps I shouldn't complain, some folk who are less fortunate would give their eye teeth for what I have, it's just that sometimes I need some "time out", desperately! Of course I have a husband of Italian origins, who's family ethic would have everyone living under our roof for ever more, the more the merrier, so I'm somewhat on my own when it comes to needing my space................it's a difficult one.

Work remains frustrating at best, but then we are talking about the NHS here. Our orthopaedic "step down" facility works well when it is permitted to do so. Unfortunately when the rest of the hospital is in crisis, most of the time that is, we are often called upon to receive all sorts of other specialities from all sorts of areas. It keeps it challenging and interesting of course, and I am nothing if not flexible, but sometimes the staffs' morale gets a bit battered and we feel we may have been betrayed somewhere along the line. On the up side, while the ward is constantly full we know we are needed and the threat of closure is unlikely to come knocking at our door anytime soon, so for that I feel we should be grateful, and who ever said things would be ideal, life itself is not so it must just be par for the course.

Well, I feel I have rambled on for long enough now and must get ready for work. Now I have a new password I will be sure to return soon. Keep safe and be happy everyone xx

I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOO UNFIT!

by lizzie233 @ 2008-01-25 – 11:02:54

So, got washing in the tumble drier, washing in the machine, yoga pants on, t-shirt on, trainers on and thinking, right 30 mins on the lateral thigh trainer, that'll do for me. How long did I manage? Well, wasn't even long enough to time actually, probably less than five minutes!!!!!!!!! Now, that is truly pathetic. Have been back on a couple of times, and having now managed to hobble into the hall with lactic acid filled thighs I have thrown myself into the computer chair.................... feel that burn!! I WILL attempt again later and my feeling is something is better than nothing, which is my usual regime, so got to give myself minute credit for that surely. Trouble is I'm already thinking about my egg mayo sandwich later, now that just is not a good sign. I believe I have the genetic slob gene no getting away from it, not that I'm a smoker (lets praise the lord for small mercies), but "changing bad habits of a lifetime" has got to be more difficult than giving up the nicotine sticks - sure I will be shouted down on that one. We all have our crosses to bear, mine just happens to be made of FAT

Right, off for another session, although doubt little and often is what the fitness guru brigade have in mind, but as above, better than nothing surely. All power to my quads and hamstrings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy weekend everyone xxxxx

Here's to good health

by lizzie233 @ 2008-01-24 – 13:07:26

Yes indeedy, have turned a corner and can say I feel totally normal this lovely sunny day, well, what ever normal is of course. Could have gone back to work really but having been signed off anyway, why be stupid about it. Nasty virus, closest to "real flu" I can remember in a long time, not alone in my suffering as possibly more than 75% of UK suffering also, those who aren't throwing up all over the place! Oh dear, certainly don't want that one thanks.

Am catching up on things not done for a while and generally enjoying my own company. Have had email and mobile phone contact with work, nothing much changed there so am not missing anything. Our ward is still being used as an annexe for the rest of the hospital's shortfalls. In other words when there's the obligatory bed crisis, like every day of the week, patients are shipped from pillar to post so that others can be brought in, 9 times out of 10 into totally the wrong speciality environment. Reason being, time targets in A & E are not breached (heaven forbid!!) and despite the building bursting at the seams, apart from the white elephant that is the Treatment Centre (4 floors of state of the art building and equipment with only on floor open), no one is EVER turned away. They're not cared for very well, but they're never turned away, so hey, that's ok it all looks good on paper.

Anyway, all will be well come April, new financial year and all, someone somewhere will wave a magic wand, come up with some pie in the sky nutty idea to get us the all important Foundation Status, and off we'll go again at some wild tangent. I dare say that soon in the name of being "seen to be clean" we'll all have to be dipped like sheep on arrival at work and then wear disposable uniforms which will be steam cleaned off us at the end of each shift! Many a true word spoken in jest..................

No, I'm in no hurry to return to work!! Bring on the weekend, perhaps I'll actually enjoy it this week. And a happy one to everyone xxxxx

Feeling bad

by lizzie233 @ 2008-01-21 – 13:53:52

Feeling bad twice over really, first because it's been so long since I was here blogging and second because I'm one of the millions who must be suffering with some virus or another this January. Happily for me its not the "winter vomiting bug", maybe that's yet to come, oh lucky, lucky me! In our house we're all hacking and barking with aching heads, eyes, limbs, you name it, generally feeling pretty pathetic actually. Nothing obviously compared with the suffering of some, but none the less, gives us something solid to moan about for a while. So, am off work for a couple of days, and at least feeling a bit better today, or wouldn't even be here, as over past few days have had to return to bed and fitfully feverishly sleep the day away AGAIN! Not nice.

Anyway belated happy new year to everyone, and bugs aside lets all make it a healthy and happy one as far as possible.

Work is work............the NHS still all over the place and we have a new Chief Exec, oh joy! So we've all got to think "out of our boxes" and other such management speak. Personally I am out of my box on a regular basis but I don't think that's quite what they mean! At least I still have a ward, fabulous team of workers and of course "patients", often forgotten in the business driven NHS of today I feel. They want to close us one minute, expand us the next you name it, and the new financial year always heralds the wild and wacky ideas from "the board" so bring it on I say, I'll be out of my box there waiting for it.

Family all well, except the virus as above, but we don't do badly really, look beyond the debt, the messy home and all that, we actually ok. Hope you all are too xxxxx

Feeling yucky

by lizzie233 @ 2007-11-22 – 10:51:16

Feel like a sloth actually, must be hormonal, more likely lack of them at my time of life. If I didn't have to go to work this p.m. I would happily return to bed. Only got Saturday off this week too, eyelids getting heavy just at the thought.

Fed up with the flaming McCanns, I know I've said that before, but the trouble is the media keep it all going. Now talking about neglect, well actually neglect is probably a bit strong, they were selfish and stupid to leave those 3 kiddies in that appartment for reasons I have exhausted before, but possibly not guilty of actual neglect that's a whole different area. It all comes from having too much and wanting even more - they are obviously well off, both being professionals in highly paid jobs, lovely home, lovely family but it's never enough is it and once again, disease if you like of this generation, they want nothing to change when they have a family, well it does and they ought to be thinking it changes for the better, not what they are going to miss out on. Seems to me no one these days wants to save for the things they need/want, and when people have children all they whinge on about is missing out on their "me time" - get a grip everyone. Either that or stay single and selfish.

Boring myself now and anyway must dry my hair, have a bath and get to work. Hope everyone happy, trust I will have more life when next I visit blogland.

Panorama

by lizzie233 @ 2007-11-20 – 10:33:16

I know, the McCanns, I'm bored with it all myself, talk about overkill. However having seen the above prog last eve just had to comment, don't really know why but feel many must be harbouring similar thoughts.

Right, if you're taking your young family on a holiday why in the name of all that's supposedly normal do you put them in a "play club" all day and every day? I know I am probably of a different generation, but only just, our family holidays were just that, included THE FAMILY. We didn't go abroad in those days, money for one thing, although our choice of English Country Cottages was probably more expensive in hindsight that a "eurocamp" for example, but there we are. The hols themselves, weather permitting naturally, were for the most part beach, a real train journey, the zoo or similar and on the rainy days, and believe me there were many, we would seek out "entertainment" probably at huge expense to keep our trio happy and amused - BUT WE WERE THERE TOO. One of my reasons for not even wanting a cross channel ferry hol was that I was totally paranoid that my youngest, fearless live-wire of a boy, would doubtless be lost overboard before we even reached our destination! My other fear was that the entire ferry would go down and as the strong swimmer how could I possibly save EVERYONE. No, I don't believe I was mad, well maybe a little, but simply a caring mother completely in love with her children. I would not, and neither would my husband, have left them when they slept while we partied with friends. When we ate, we ate together at a time suitable for them, when they slept, it was as though we were at home, we stayed in our holiday accommodation and watched tv if there was one, read or more than likely turned in ourselves being totally knackered after a day of activities with 3 young children! If you want a "singles" holiday for goodness sake leave the children with grandparents or similar at home. I fail to see why anyone would NEED three tennis lessons in one day, this has shown Mr McCann up as a pretty selfish husband and father, and six in the evening, good choice Gerry, the very time when small kiddies are at their worst, tired after a day at "holiday club" and all needing to be prepared for bed..................that's right you leave that ALL to mum and slope off for yet another tennis lesson!!! Just makes me want to slap that sour, hard, emotionless face all the more.

Anyway, doubtless we are none of us any further forward in knowing what happened to this little girl, and the media circus surrounding it all is no help what so ever. As the annoying cliche brigade would say, "work in progress"

Long, long time no blogs

by lizzie233 @ 2007-10-27 – 12:58:56

Not that I haven't been industrious, in fact I haven't stopped. Gorgeous hols and much needed rest/hang loose time back in Sept/Oct when N and I went to lovely Portugal and had a fantastic fortnight. Back to work 8 Oct, had interview for own job and got it, so the new ward is up and running with our great little team and doing well with lots of positive feedback. Usual teething probs of course and still waiting for new staff, but we're getting there and I think we're all feeling work isn't such a bad place after all, AT THE MOMENT anyway! Toby was 2 yrs old last sunday, so that was a dear little family party apart from I forgot I was working a late on the Saturday and ran out of time to make his birthday cake, so my sister bought one from M & S and brought it with her on the day, I felt a bit of a failure but it was lovely and after all you just can't be everywhere and doing everything, especially in your flaming 50's!! Tomorrow is Mike's 22nd, I dare say he will be out this eve with friends and be extremely hung over tomorrow, but he's agreed to join us for supper and N will doubtless do a burster of a roast for him, and indeed the whole family. With the day off, maybe I will make him a cake!? He hates fuss, but he's the youngest and almost wasn't here, so fuss to a certain extent is permitted especially by me as Mum. So, all is well at present, I've even got over the trauma of my credit cards being "found out" and now being extinct courtesy of a hefty Lloyds loan, relief in one way but heaven only knows how I will manage Christmas.............best not to dwell, especially not in October! I will manage, and the key this year "low profile".

I need to say that I am completely fed up with seeing the McCanns now. Its tragic, but could so easily have been avoided from the outset, the babysitting service was there for all to utilise. Natural that they wish to continue their search, but their emotionless, hard, uncrying faces are doing them absolutely no favours in my view, and I realise it is just my view........... Enough

Still alive!!

by lizzie233 @ 2007-09-10 – 19:04:09

Oh my, feel dreadful haven't blogged for an age. Happy birthday HelenMJ! Saw that on the intro.

Well the new ward opened today, what utter chaos, only to be expected we are talking about the NHS after all. All the Director of Nursing was interested in was "de-cluttering" the corridors..............give me strength! So have done a 12 hour day, so what I hear you say, well so quite a lot actually at my age and time of life! But must say am on a bit of a hyper high as at least left the ward feeling all would be well and as the phone hasn't rung yet they must be ok. No stock, drugs or anything but we are begging, borrowing and stealing at present and hoping all will be delivered tomorrow. Patients insitu and EVERY department known to man informed of our presence. Onward and upward I say and at least no Mr Arrogant to poke his 5 eggs worth in as he's away at present, no doubt will have him snooping round next week...........bring it on!!

Family well, haven't seen M this week but had chat on phone, bit down about his job but hanging in there; C working all hours and L had interview re. housing this morning haven't heard the outcome as yet, but can't be traumatic or would have had some form of hysterical communication by now. N at gym, no surprises there, and good for him, he's also had his "holiday haircut", and whooopeee we're off, crisis or plural of crisis aside, on the 22nd AND I CAN'T WAIT. Well have waited a year, so desperation setting in somewhat now. AND not only have a new ward to come back to, with renewed workplace enthusiasm, but also have little hol in Majorca (a prize from N's work) to look forward to in March, oh joy of joys, I am truly blessed, in debt but blessed.

Can't get head round the McCann business, and only said a few weeks ago that I thought the outcome may surprise us all. That aside am actually slightly fed up with the whole thing being so high profile, but makes you think does it not?

Peace and happiness to everyone xxx

All blogged out!!

by lizzie233 @ 2007-08-28 – 19:26:05

Well I have been blogging but not here, feel guilty actually! Don't know why. Facebook just seems so much easier. Anyway not that much to report. Work much the same as usual nothing moves fast in the NHS so still waiting for the extended orthopaedic ward to open, scheduled for 10 Sept now (2007!), so if on time will be there to settle in for two weeks then off to Portugal, but can't help that and no guesses for which would be more important to me!!? I wait all year for the 2 week's worth of relaxation with hubby and wild horses would have to drag me off the runway because I WILL BE ON THAT PLANE. Anyway, back at the ranch, Mr Arrogant quiet at present so must have something to his benefit up his sleeve, but to be honest, I don't care, just as long as it doesn't involve or hinder me. All well on the family front. L still determined to try for baby no. 2 despite being broke, and I know, if you waited until you could afford things you'd never do anything, but with S being away most of the time she really is like a single mum and I'm not the one wearing the rose tinted specs! C on nights this week, so naturally next door choose now to revamp their kitchen extension and there has been drilling and knocking down of brickwork until all hours, even on the BH weekend, good job C's room at front of house, poor soul. M doesn't know whether he wants to be a chef "for ever" but he's giving it a good shot and certainly putting in the hours. I think living in shared accom is a bit of a culture shock but he's loving it, just not the money side of things. I did help him out over the weekend, well not as though the other two haven't had their share over the years, so gave him a bit of cash and a goody bag too, he would never ask. Had lovely family bbq's over weekend was a really nice housefull, let the stresses and worries of work vanish into the distance and got things into perspective. Wonderful.

Pre-occupied and just a little poorly

by lizzie233 @ 2007-08-16 – 10:19:51

Had last week off work, just as week off wasn't ill then, luckily. Spent the weekend with my sister on the Isle of Wight, eating all the wrong things, laughing a lot, staying up late and having whistle stop visits with her offspring. So, almost needed a break to get over that one! Back to work this Monday and it was worse than awful, talk about hit the ground running, it was no joke and communication seemed to be at an all time low.........I discovered a patient I had not been told about, who hadn't even been admitted and was due for surgery within minutes!! Good job I do a little "tour of duty", meet 'n greet type at the beginning of the shift. Anyway that's in the past now and since then I have obtained some sort of bug which started showing itself during the early shift on Tues. Yesterday I just slept it off, no choice really was too weak to do much else, and today I feel a little better but nowhere near 100%, good job I have some days off. Working over weekend. Joy of joys no operating lists.

My pre-occupation I'm afraid, and almost ashamed to say, has been with Facebook!! Someone at work "forced" me to go on and of course I'm addicted. Truly I must be one of the oldest on there but it just appeals to my extremely childish nature. All good fun